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+--- Thread: Intro on Mom with 13 year old SPD kid (/thread-1778.html)
Intro on Mom with 13 year old SPD kid - sylvia - 08-16-2016
Hi everyone,
My son is 13. His SPD is tactile defensiveness and recently it has been a huge struggle. We have done OT with when he was younger, we have seen a Naturopath, all with limited success. Somehow the last few years we have hobbled along and dealt with things on a day to day basis, but now things are much worse.
My son has a very difficult time with shoes - crocs were our saviour for years, socks (does not wear), underwear (does not wear), pants and shirts, jackets.
Sheets, blankets, towels - all can be a problem.
Maybe it is mixed in with puberty at this time and things are very challenging, it is affecting my son's mental health as he gets very frustrated with himself, he knows he has this problem, he knows it is not "normal". He feels awful that kids at school can wear whatever they want and he cannot. He says he is in pain everyday and sometimes wishes he was dead. We do have a few sporadic "good days" but they are very rare.
We are in Portland, Oregon. I am in the process of connecting again with doctors, therapists etc.
A big part of me feels like I have failed him, like I should have done more when he was younger.
I would love to hear from teens who are tactile defensive, maybe they can share what has helped them. I am curious if the Brushing Protocol has helped any teens with tactile spd? We have not done that.
I would love to hear from moms who are in a similar situation.
I would love to hear about any great teen therapists in the Portland area who can help him.
Thank you!
RE: Intro on Mom with 13 year old SPD kid - briep41 - 08-18-2016
Hi. My name is Brie and although I'm not a teenager (I'm 32), I do have severe tactile defensiveness.
First of all, please stop thinking you've failed your son. Your post alone is proof that you love him, support him, and are fighting for him.
Puberty can definitely effect SPD. There may also be problems if the clothes he feels comfortable in aren't considered cool. Being accepted by your peers is such a huge part of being a teenager, and when you know there's something "different" about you it can create even more pressure to fit in. Finding a mental health therapist who knows about sensory processing issues (therapists with a background in autism disorders would be a good place to start looking since SPD isn't as widely known) could help a lot with the anxiety, depression, and self esteem issues that can come with SPD.
As for the brushing protocol, I tried it and it wasn't for me but everyone's different so it's worth asking an occupational therapist about.
RE: Intro on Mom with 13 year old SPD kid - sylvia - 08-19-2016
Thank you Brie! That is a great suggestion about the therapist with a background in autism. I will mention this at our doctors appointment on Monday.
RE: Intro on Mom with 13 year old SPD kid - Casper - 09-01-2016
(08-16-2016, 02:21 PM)sylvia Wrote: Hi everyone,
My son is 13. His SPD is tactile defensiveness and recently it has been a huge struggle. We have done OT with when he was younger, we have seen a Naturopath, all with limited success. Somehow the last few years we have hobbled along and dealt with things on a day to day basis, but now things are much worse.
My son has a very difficult time with shoes - crocs were our saviour for years, socks (does not wear), underwear (does not wear), pants and shirts, jackets.
Sheets, blankets, towels - all can be a problem.
Maybe it is mixed in with puberty at this time and things are very challenging, it is affecting my son's mental health as he gets very frustrated with himself, he knows he has this problem, he knows it is not "normal". He feels awful that kids at school can wear whatever they want and he cannot. He says he is in pain everyday and sometimes wishes he was dead. We do have a few sporadic "good days" but they are very rare.
We are in Portland, Oregon. I am in the process of connecting again with doctors, therapists etc.
A big part of me feels like I have failed him, like I should have done more when he was younger.
I would love to hear from teens who are tactile defensive, maybe they can share what has helped them. I am curious if the Brushing Protocol has helped any teens with tactile spd? We have not done that.
I would love to hear from moms who are in a similar situation.
I would love to hear about any great teen therapists in the Portland area who can help him.
Thank you!
I am 17 and have SPD, my parents had me in OT and when I was 3 until I was 6, during puberty time some of my sensory issues came back, it can be tough having SPD at his age because kids realized I was a bit different. I went back to OT two years ago and am learning how to cope. My weighted blanket helps me a lot at home, sometimes I wear a compression shirt under armor because it helps me feel calm by squishing me. Keep helping your son when It can be tough. I used to cry when I wore certain clothes because they all felt itchy. My mom would brush my arms and it helped desensitize me a lot. I now can tolerate most clothes but still don't like jeans. Tell your son to stay strong.