After a lot of frustration on the part of DS (3) and myself in trying to figure out how I was "parenting him wrong," we finally got the diagnosis of SPD sensory seeking. I had been confused, so exhausted, and at my wit's end trying to figure out how why DS does some of the things he does and how just to manage our day to day routine and still have time for DS2 (8 months). DS is a wonderful, happy, energetic boy, but does these things throughout the day:

-running everywhere without regard for stopping, even in parking lots
-banging to make noise and break things
-screaming and shrieking
-throwing toys, pushing over furniture
-dumping/spilling things out
-breaking anything and everything in sight that is not too heavy to pick up
-slamming things
-jumping off of furniture and high places
-putting inappropriate things like trash in his mouth
-drawn like a moth to a flame to lights, electrical outlets, fans, shiny things, loud music going to extreme lengths to play with these things
-climbing on tables to swing chandeliers and unscrew the lightbulbs
-multiple screaming tantrums over transitions even with warning
-physically aggressive - hitting, biting, pinching, slapping
-cannot settle down to sleep, wakes up at night

DS and I are getting some skills to help in therapy, but DH insists DS is a perfectly normal child and he acts this way to get attention, that he cannot play on his own, because I have been "parenting him wrong" and it is "my fault". I have thought from the beginning that something is not quite right with DS (he had colic and never slept as a baby). DH went as far to say that DS would better off with someone else caring for him (I am SAHM right now) because I am "not cut out" to parent him. We continue to get into arguments over approaching how to respond and parent DS, and it makes me feel so disrespected, hurt, and isolated because he sees DS's behavior as my failure. Advice?