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at whits end
Author Message
ashersmum Offline
Newbie

Posts: 2
Joined: Feb 2015
#1
Question  at whits end

Hi. I have a 4 year old son. He has always amazed us with his ability to learn and problem solve. He has had many issues as a child like he has never been able to stand noises. He will not listen to us when we talk and we have had his ears checked and he is fine. Recently he has stopped sleeping. His mind races. He doesn't know his own strength and is hurting our cat and us with his hugs. He has melt downs over little things and he cant handle the world. He is also only 4 but taught himself maths (I'm not kidding) he can do subtraction and addition. He stays awake at night in bed thinking. We have tried diet changes, worming, a psychologist, spending more time, talking. Things have gotten so bad right now. It may not sound it but our whole life revolves around trying to help our boy just be. Kindy has said they have had some alarm bells and he may have SPD. The doctor just said I'm a bad mother basically. Which I promise I'm not. I'm discipline when needed but this is beyond discipline. Any thought people. I'm sorry if this doesn't sound like a SPD child I'm just in a puddle of tears and i googled this forum
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mrwebb Offline
Regular

Posts: 11
Joined: Feb 2015
#2
RE: at whits end

Being called a bad mother is the worst. My in laws have raked my wife over the coals with that same message that "you just have to get mad! let him know who's in charge" - and you can't negotiate with a child's sensory feelings. A behaviorist explained it to me by comparing it to a smoker's nicotine fit - it's always operating under the surface.



(02-03-2015, 06:12 AM)ashersmum Wrote: Hi. I have a 4 year old son. He has always amazed us with his ability to learn and problem solve. He has had many issues as a child like he has never been able to stand noises. He will not listen to us when we talk and we have had his ears checked and he is fine. Recently he has stopped sleeping. His mind races. He doesn't know his own strength and is hurting our cat and us with his hugs. He has melt downs over little things and he cant handle the world. He is also only 4 but taught himself maths (I'm not kidding) he can do subtraction and addition. He stays awake at night in bed thinking. We have tried diet changes, worming, a psychologist, spending more time, talking. Things have gotten so bad right now. It may not sound it but our whole life revolves around trying to help our boy just be. Kindy has said they have had some alarm bells and he may have SPD. The doctor just said I'm a bad mother basically. Which I promise I'm not. I'm discipline when needed but this is beyond discipline. Any thought people. I'm sorry if this doesn't sound like a SPD child I'm just in a puddle of tears and i googled this forum

Being called a bad mother is the worst. My in laws have raked my wife over the coals with that same message that "you just have to get mad! let him know who's in charge" - and you can't negotiate with a child's sensory feelings. A behaviorist explained it to me by comparing it to a smoker's nicotine fit - it's always operating under the surface.



(02-03-2015, 06:12 AM)ashersmum Wrote: Hi. I have a 4 year old son. He has always amazed us with his ability to learn and problem solve. He has had many issues as a child like he has never been able to stand noises. He will not listen to us when we talk and we have had his ears checked and he is fine. Recently he has stopped sleeping. His mind races. He doesn't know his own strength and is hurting our cat and us with his hugs. He has melt downs over little things and he cant handle the world. He is also only 4 but taught himself maths (I'm not kidding) he can do subtraction and addition. He stays awake at night in bed thinking. We have tried diet changes, worming, a psychologist, spending more time, talking. Things have gotten so bad right now. It may not sound it but our whole life revolves around trying to help our boy just be. Kindy has said they have had some alarm bells and he may have SPD. The doctor just said I'm a bad mother basically. Which I promise I'm not. I'm discipline when needed but this is beyond discipline. Any thought people. I'm sorry if this doesn't sound like a SPD child I'm just in a puddle of tears and i googled this forum
(This post was last modified: 02-03-2015, 10:23 AM by mrwebb.)
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Zelexis Offline
Regular

Posts: 14
Joined: Feb 2015
#3
RE: at whits end

People are ignorant and insensitive. They don't want to understand the special nature of children that are out of the "norm". These people do not matter in your life and don't let them, allowing them to hurt you emotionally gives them power. They don't deserve it and especially not where it concerns your children. Ignoring negative, ignorant people works very well.
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Tuttleturtle Offline
Regular

Posts: 223
Joined: Jan 2012
#4
RE: at whits end

Does he like tight hugs and being squeezed? Are there other sensory things he likes? Can you integrate his figuring out teaching himself math into play? (rocks and puddles and splashing!) Can you reduce how many noises are going on? (Sound isolation between rooms, to the road, different silverware and plates, etc).

http://turtleisaverb.blogspot.com
One autistic/SPD adult making her way through life.
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